Our Life - in a mega nutshell

Before and After of our 1st house

• We buy a little fixer house in Lincoln and learn that I am pretty good at mudding drywall and that we know nothing about plumbing or getting rid of carpenter ants
• Johnathan gets a job in the local prison and comes home one day to find I have ripped out all the green shag carpeting in the house. We had discussed it, but he didn't think I meant I wanted to do it that very day. We lived on plywood subflooring for many months.
• 6 kids sounds good, so we get the ball rolling only to suffer a very early term miscarriage.
  
• We discuss and determine that we hate winter and the cold..let's move someplace warm! We decided it would be Texas and Johnathan got a second job and we picked a date to move. No, we had no jobs..we were just packing up and going.
• July 2000 - we arrive just in time to experience record heat in Irving, TX. Whoa..we were not prepared for this!
• I graduate from DBU and quit smoking! July 3rd, 2001 to be exact. Johnathan realizes he hates the office environment and re-evaluates his career path. I am at home recovering from my 2nd miscarriage when the news begins to show the twin towers exploding. Talk about getting some perspective!
  
• We buy a house in Watauga, TX and lose our 3rd pregnancy.
• We start attending Mt Gilead church and I accept Christ and am baptized by Pastor Nathan Tucker.
  
• We each have gastric bypass surgery and lose close to half our original body weight.

• Johnathan decides he wants to be a police officer and attends the police academy. I get hired as a Contract Analyst for Sabre.
• As a surprise 4 year wedding anniversary present to me, Johnathan has us renew our vows and we are re-hitched Texas style by Pastor Nathan Tucker. (More on this whole event in a later post....it's quite impressive)
• Johnathan is voted "Rookie of the Year" at Keller PD
  
• We lose our 4th and 5th pregnancies.
• Johnathan really misses the military life...as do I. He decides to join the Army National Guard. They never leave the state, you know, so it should be a great way to dip our toes back into that lifestyle.
• After months of tinkering, a fertility clinic finally figures out the right combination/timing of meds I need to get pregnant....yeah! April 2004 marks the month where we make it past the first trimester for the first time.
• While on vacation to Michigan for my half brother's high school graduation, we hear that Johnathan's guard unit is being sent to Iraq. I am 5 months pregnant. He leaves for training in Ft Hood soon after we get back into town.

• The "regular" visits back home during training end up being very few and far between. I am getting a taste of what being a single parent would be like and it stinks. After all, I don't know anything about kids...or babies for that matter. What am I going to do?
• November 9, 2004 - The day I am induced. Johnathan gets to be home for a few days. We are so excited to have this baby that the delivery room is filled with family and friends....literally. The doctor thinks bleachers should have been ordered and asks if the lost pizza guy in the hallway is welcome to join our "group." Ha Ha.

• The R&R days pass far too quickly and we wait for the next R&R visits near Thanksgiving and Christmas.
  
• I decide to have a going away party/prayer time for Johnathan and ask the elder pastoring in Nathan's absence to announce the event in church. He responds, "I'm sorry, but that's not church business." Interesting. If a man, leaving his family to go fight in war, risking his life isn't church business I don't know what is.
  
• Jan 1, 2005 - Deployment Ceremony To this day I start crying just remembering Johnathan kissing Olivia's forehead and having to walk away for a year. Honor, sadness, fear, loneliness and sense of duty are the mixed bag of emotions I draw from.

• Over the year Johnathan is gone I realize what a great blessing our church family has become. The Holt family dutifully cared for our yard. Friends and neighbors rallied to help me carry in groceries and catch up on housework. I knew we were loved during this time period.
  
• One Sunday, Pastor Nathan stood up and basically left the church. He was being asked to leave and would be starting a church plant elsewhere. I had no idea what to do. people were getting up and following him. What would Johnathan want me to do? I followed my heart and left, too. I took up watching the babies at the new "church" for the first year. I just really had a hard time leaving Olivia. I felt Johnathan's presence when I was with her...they are practically clones of one another come to find out!
• I had a digital camera and tried my best to take photos of Olivia every day to e-mail to Johnathan. He and I were even able to chat once in awhile via webcam. My family jokes that Olivia would be more documented than the Kennedys...serious foreshadowing : )
• The year passes and I do not shrivel up and die like I thought I would. See, miracles do still happen! Olivia takes right to Daddy and to this day has no clue he was ever gone. God works in mysterious ways.

• Reintegration into family life takes some time. PTSD is a serious affliction most guys end up facing when returning from that kind of situation. We avoid places like the mall and really anywhere that a large crowd gathers and loud noises occur. For the first time, I see my husband as tormented and broken and it pains me to know I can do nothing to help.
  
• Life gets back to normal soon and we decide we want to move to Keller. Now that we are not having 6 children, we won't be needing this large of a house. We decide to downsize and I begin to have the urge to be a stay at home mom. This may seem perfectly normal, but I am not one of those women. I have a college degree...I have a good paying job....up until I had Olivia I didn't even like kids! This desire really confused me, but then it wasn't part of my master plan.
• We find a smaller house and somehow, things work out to where we can afford for me to quit my job. OK, how did something so seemingly impossible all of a sudden become so possible? May 2007 I leave Sabre and don't look back. I am one year shy of my 6 year mark there.
• May 2008 - I find out I have at least one serious disease and am basically as healthy now as I will ever be. Things will only get progressively worse. We are going to work at making sure that progression is as slow as possible, though. It sure is a good thing (or is it a God thing) I no longer have to worry about a corporate job and can stay at home and focus on myself and my family.